Be afraid, be very afraid

The Post reports that Cristian Guzman and Nick Logan are on the mend and may be back with the big club soon.

This reminds me of the time I saw Alien for the first time. I spent the entire movie slumped in my seat, holding a crumbled box of Dots in front of my eyes, trying to hide the horror of what I thought I was about to see.

That's how I felt when I read the Post article. Why?

Well, this is Cristian Guzman's line from 2005: .219/.260/.314. His VORP was -14.9, meaning that Frank Robinson would have been a more productive player--the manager, not the player in his prime. Think 2005 was an aberration? Not bloody likely! He had 492 plate appearances, so this wasn't a slump. And his line in 2004 with the Twins wasn't much better: .274/.309/.384. There is a word for production like this, and the word is "pathetic."

Nick Logan isn't much better. Here is his line from 2005, which was the last year in which he had substantial major league playing time: .258/.305/.335. In 99 plate appearances in 2006 his line was .300/.337/.389.

Here's an idea. Instead of bringing Guzman and Logan back, why don't the Nationals hold open public tryouts? There has got to be two better players roaming the streets of Washington, and the publicity would boost the franchise. Anyone want us to put in a good word for you with Jim Bowden?